What Do Japanese Say When Someone Dies?

by | Last updated on January 24, 2024

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The following are general phrases to offer condolences at a Japanese funeral or wake: –

Goshuushou-sama desu

(You must be grieving terribly.) This can be used no matter your relationship to the person. – O-kuyami moushiagemasu (I offer my condolences.)

How do Japanese honor the dead?

The majority of funerals (葬儀, sōgi or 葬式, sōshiki) in Japan include a wake,

the cremation of the deceased

, a burial in a family grave, and a periodic memorial service. According to 2007 statistics, 99.81% of deceased Japanese are cremated.

How do you express condolences in Japanese?

If you need something more versatile that can be used in conversation or in written correspondence, then you can use

お悔やみ申し上げます (O-kuyami mōshiagemasu, “I offer my condolences”)

. An equivalent written-only version is 哀悼の意を表します (Aitō no i o hyō shimasu, “I express my condolences”).

How do you say dead condolences?

  1. “We are so sorry for your loss.”
  2. “I'm going to miss her, too.”
  3. “I hope you feel surrounded by much love.”
  4. “Sharing in your sadness as you remember Juan.”
  5. “Sharing in your sadness as you remember Dan.”
  6. “Sending healing prayers and comforting hugs. …
  7. “With deepest sympathy as you remember Robert.”

What is Otsuya?

Japanese funerals take place over two days, families will hold a wake called “Otsuya” (meaning,

to ‘pass the night'

) before the actual funeral. Then, on the second day, they will have the actual ceremony known as “kokubetsushiki”. The Otsuya begins in the evening on the eve of the funeral.

How do you send a condolence message?

  1. My/our condolences on the passing of your father/mother/friend.
  2. Please accept our sincerest condolences. …
  3. I was so sad to hear of your loss. …
  4. My heartfelt condolences on your loss. …
  5. [insert name] will never be forgotten. …
  6. The ones we love are never gone; they live within our hearts.

What do you send to a Japanese funeral?

Lilys and chrysanthemums in yellow and white are appropriate choices. In Japanese culture “

koden”

is a more appropriate sympathy expression than flowers. Koden is a monetary gift given to help alleviate . Large funeral wreaths called “hanawa” may also be sent.

Do Japanese cry at funerals?

At all other times,

two people holding anything with chopsticks at the same time will remind everyone

of the funeral of a close relative causing everyone to break down and cry for hours on end. This is considered a major social faux pas in Japan. … Many companies have graves in the largest graveyard in Japan, Okunoin.

Do Japanese talk to the dead?

For the faint hearted, this might come as a surprise but

a town in Japan actually has a phone booth they use to talk to the dead

. … According to a report in Travel and Leisure, the phone booth which is just like any other is used by locals and tourists to talk their loved ones as and when they miss them.

What happens on the 49th day after death?


Buddhist ceremony held in memory of a deceased person seven times

, once every seven days, for 49 days after death. … According to this belief, repeated sutra recitation of the living during the 49 day period helps the dead to be reborn in a better world.

What is the best condolence message?


Rest in peace

.

Wishing you peace

to bring comfort, the courage to face the days ahead and loving memories to forever hold in your hearts. Today and always, may fond memories bring you peace, support, and strength. With our love and deepest sympathy as we remember [Name]

What can I say instead of sorry for your loss?

  • “I am here for you, no matter what.”
  • “I know you are hurting.”
  • “I'm sorry that I can't take this pain away.”
  • “Let me take care of this errand for you.”
  • “I love you.”

What are some comforting words?

  • I'm sorry.
  • I care about you.
  • He/she will be dearly missed.
  • He/she is in my thoughts and prayers.
  • You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.
  • You are important to me.
  • My condolences.
  • I hope you find some peace today.

Is it OK to wear patterns to a funeral?


Patterns are okay for funerals

, as long as they don't look too flashy. A floral patterned skirt, or a dark-colored striped shirt, is played down enough to be appropriate for a funeral. However, bright and flashy patterns are to be avoided, especially if they use flashy colors as well.

What is a koden?

Koden (香典) Koden (香典) is

a term to refer to a gift of money offered to the dead at a Buddhist funeral

. … Typically, koden is wrapped in a special envelope called koden-bukuro (bushugi-bukuro) and is passed to the bereaved family at the funeral (lykewake or funeral service).

What can you not do at a Japanese funeral?

– If, for example, you cannot attend the funeral or wake for whatever reason, always inform the bereaved the reason for not being able to attend, and if they accept anything in lieu of not attending.

Do not send condolence flowers

, as they are considered inappropriate in most cases.

Maria Kunar
Author
Maria Kunar
Maria is a cultural enthusiast and expert on holiday traditions. With a focus on the cultural significance of celebrations, Maria has written several blogs on the history of holidays and has been featured in various cultural publications. Maria's knowledge of traditions will help you appreciate the meaning behind celebrations.