Why Does My Child Shut Down At School?

Shut-down learners are children who

become academically discouraged and disconnected from school over time

. A simple formula helps explain how kids become shut-down learners: Cracks in the foundation + time + lack of understanding + strained family communication = shut-down learner.

Why does my child behave at home but not at school?

It's possible that the cause is

simply a difference in routine between home and school

. You can troubleshoot ideas with the teacher to try and align the home rules with the school rules. Meeting with the teacher will also give you an insight into the relationship your little one has with their teacher.

How do you deal with a child that shuts down?

1. Don't talk, listen. Or at least, talk less, listen more.
2. Don't talk directly to your child. Let him overhear you expressing your concern or uncertainty (but not any criticism or judgment) to someone else.
3. Write him or her a letter. Yep. Actually on paper.

What causes your child to shut down?

Generally, there are two modes of shutting down:

oppositional and emotional

. When a child refuses to talk to a parent because he or she is not getting his or her way, the child may be acting oppositional. The refusal to talk to the parent feels like stonewalling or pouting.

Why is my child getting in trouble at school?

Often, bad behavior is a way for kids to act out when they can't handle stresses in their lives, such as a move or divorce. It also could be a warning sign of

an underlying

problem, like they're having trouble in school, playing too many violent video games, or not getting enough sleep.

What is the most psychologically damaging thing you can say to a child?

Ellen Perkins wrote: “Without doubt, the number one most psychologically damaging thing you can say to a child is ‘

I don't love you

‘ or ‘you were a mistake'.

What to do if child is misbehaving in school?

1. Don't punish your child. Children aren't to blame for having bad feelings, says Wipfler. …
2. Think about what's going on in your child's life. …
3. Try talking. …
4. Let your child fall apart. …
5. Stay close to your child. …
6. Play with your child.

What can I do instead of shutting down?

• Be present and remember that their Avoidance likely has little to do with you.
• Provide a safe space and remind them that you are available.
• Keep your promise; be available.
• Put your judgment in the backseat.
• Actively listen.
• Provide abundant reassurance.

How do you know if your child has selective mutism?

Watch for these signs of selective mutism:

Rigid, “stiff as a board” body posture

. Expressionless, flat or “deer in headlights” face. Slow to respond in a social situation. Clinginess with parents when entering into social settings.

How do I stop mentally shutting down?

1. take a break from, or “table” the conversation.
2. write down your thoughts and feelings to revisit later.
3. stay calm.
4. don't retaliate.
5. don't throw an adult temper tantrum.
6. do something self-soothing.
7. consider professional intervention.

What kind of bad Behaviour children usually have?

These problems can result from temporary stressors in the child's life, or they might represent more enduring disorders. The most common disruptive behaviour disorders include

oppositional defiant disorder (ODD)

, conduct disorder (CD) and attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD).

How do you punish a child for not doing homework?

1. Natural Consequences. Instead of yelling at your child when he's, once again, forgotten his homework, let him experience the natural consequences of not turning it in on time. …
2. Home Homework. Why Do Toddlers Laugh When Disciplined? …
3. Reward System. …
4. Make Her Pay.

Can a child with ADHD behave in school?

Children with ADHD often have problems with their behaviour at school, and the

condition can negatively affect a child's

academic progress. Speak to your child's teachers or their school's special educational needs co-ordinator (SENCO) about any extra support your child may need.

What do you do when your child goes to school?

1. Volunteering– School on Wheels (lunch time tutoring at-risk kids), helping out at my kids' school.
2. Making Money– blog, occasional house painting, managing our rental property.
3. Recreation– golf, fishing, blog promotion on social media.
4. Household Stuff– chores, repairs, etc. …
5. Exercise– running, weightlifting.

What is bad behavior in school?

Bullying, teasing, hitting and name-calling

are forms of bad behavior that occur in school. The adjustments to the rules at school and in the classroom environment can trigger inappropriate behavior in children, especially when in an environment with 20 or more students.

Can I call the police to scare my child?

There are times that you may need to call the police on your child. If your child's behavior has escalated to the point of physical abuse, assault, and destruction of property, or if he is engaging in risky or dangerous behavior outside the home, then getting the policed involved might be the right thing to do.