The Jewish funeral service typically includes
prayers by the rabbi, and may also include eulogies by the rabbi and/or family members
. The funeral is not considered a social event, but a ritual to pay respects to the deceased.
What happens at a Jewish funeral?
A Jewish burial will mainly
consist of prayer, hymns and religious readings
. As a mourner, you are not expected to say anything in particular at the service, however, as with any funeral, it’s considerate to offer your sympathy for the family’s loss.
What do you not wear to a Jewish funeral?
Modest, conservative clothing
is best. As this is a time of mourning, bright or flashy attire should be avoided. Anything that you wear should be neat and tidy. Suits, dress shirts and slacks for men and dresses for women should be in the gray, black or brown family.
Do you bring anything to a Jewish funeral?
Fruit baskets or food trays
are appropriate gifts for Jewish funerals, as shiva requires mourners to abstain from cooking and other daily activities. Alternatively, you can make a donation to a charity in the deceased person’s name.
How many days after death is a Jewish funeral?
Typically, the time between death and burial is not long. Traditionally a Jewish burial is supposed to take place
within 24 hours of death
. This is done in accordance with the Torah, sacred Jewish scripture, which says, “You shall bury him the same day….
Can I wear jeans to a Shiva?
And men should wear a tie to a funeral service.
What color do you wear to a Shiva?
Making a shiva call isn’t going to be a party in any sense, but neither will it be a dark, depressing visit. In that vein, there is no requirement to
wear black
, nor do you need to worry if your outfit is a little too colorful. The key for dressing to go to a shiva is to be respectful of the family in mourning.
What is appropriate to bring to a shiva?
Shiva baskets typically contain
baked goods, dried fruit, nuts, fresh fruits and/or chocolates
. The food items in a shiva basket are designed to provide nourishment and energy to those sitting shiva for the entire seven days. This is a traditional shiva gift and is appropriate to give to a Jewish family in mourning.
What can you not say at a shiva house?
- “How are you?” (They’re not so good.)
- “I know how you feel.” (No you don’t. …
- “At least she lived a long life.” (Longer would have been better.)
- “It’s good that you have other children,” or, “Don’t worry, you’ll have more.” (The loss of a child, no matter what age, is completely devastating.)
How long do you stay at a shiva?
The shiva period lasts for
seven days following the
burial. Following the initial period of despair and lamentation immediately after the death, shiva embraces a time when individuals discuss their loss and accept the comfort of others.
What is forbidden during Shiva?
Shiva Restrictions
During shiva the following acts are prohibited for the mourners:
Leaving the house, except to go to synagogue on Shabbat
, or even during the week if there is no minyan at the shiva house. Work or any business pursuits. Shaving or haircuts.
Do you bring wine to a Shiva?
My understanding is that traditions have relaxed somewhat in most religious communities but that
wine is permitted even from the first portion of lamentation throughout the period of Shiva
. It is not a wake, nor a celebration, not until the first seven days are past.
What is a Shiva meal?
Shiva Meal (Seudat Havra-ah) is
a meal of condolence prepared by friends to provide the mourners sustenance following the burial
. The meal should contain round foods (symbolizing life and renewal), such as hard-boiled eggs, bagels or lentils.
What do you say when you sit Shiva?
It is a mitzvah to visit a house of mourning during Shiva. We visit to offer friendship and sympathy to the mourner. It is customary to say to the mourners:
Ha-Makom ye-nachem etchem be-toch she’ar avelay Tziyon vi-Yerushala’yim
. May the Lord comfort you together with all mourners of Zion and Jerusalem.”
What happens at a Shiva call?
This call is
to remind mourners that they’re not alone
. You are encouraged to listen and be compassionate support during the call. Mourners are welcome to express sadness and heartache. When you approach a home that’s sitting shiva, you’re invited to walk right in.
Is there a dress code for sitting shiva?
The dress code for a Shiva visit—The most important thing to remember about your dress—be
respectful
. It’s better to err on the conservative side. Men should wear long pants and women are best advised to wear long skirts and long-sleeved shirts.
