What Is The Most Psychologically Damaging Thing You Can Say To A Parent?

by | Last updated on January 24, 2024

, , , ,

He said: “Children are very sensitive to inflection and mood in parental delivery. Probably more so than they are sensitive to content.” Karl Ngantcha added that saying

nothing at all

is the most psychologically damaging thing you can do to a child.

Contents hide

How do I stop hurting my parents feelings?

  1. Acknowledge your anger. “I need to move on; it's been too long.” …
  2. Talk about the hurt. …
  3. Set boundaries with your parents. …
  4. Love yourself and believe in your worthiness.

How do I stop being responsible for my parents?

  1. The Guilt Component. The truth is that your parents' emotional pain is their responsibility. …
  2. Share Your Story With Safe People. Feeling responsible for other people's feelings can be an isolating experience. …
  3. Set Boundaries At Your Own Pace. …
  4. Learn to Rely On Others. …
  5. Listen To Your Needs.

What do you do when you hurt your mom?


Calm yourself

by repeating soothing things to yourself, such as “You are okay, just calm down” or “Take it easy, everything will be okay.” Leave the situation and go for a walk or a run. Exercising will help relieve some of the intensity of your anger, and the time away will give you time to think.

Why do I hurt my mom?

If you feel you've been wronged, hurt, or mistreated by someone, it's natural to have

feelings of hatred or animosity towards them

. … Most commonly, hatred toward your mother is your mental way of shielding yourself from further despair.

What should you never say to your child?

  • 1. “ …
  • “I do everything for you” …
  • “You did well but you could do better” …
  • “Don't eat that or else you're going to get fat” …
  • “It's not that big of a deal” or “Stop being such a baby” …
  • “Do I have to tell you this 100 times?” …
  • “Big girls/boys don't do that”

What teens should not say?

  • If only you worked to your potential.
  • You shouldn't care what others think about you.
  • You wouldn't be able to function without me telling you what to do.
  • You just need to find your passion.
  • If only you knew how smart you are.
  • You're crazy for thinking that.
  • You're always selfish.

Why do I hate my parents?

Causes. The factors that lead a person to hate their family or members of their family can vary.

Toxic behaviors, abuse, neglect, or conflict

are just a few factors that can lead to feelings of animosity. Finding ways to better understand the causes for such feelings can help you better cope with the situation.

How do you stop your parents for punishing you?


Be respectful

.

Being respectful will help keep you from receiving punishments in the first place, but if you find yourself in hot water, stay calm and polite. The more you yell, the madder your parent is going to be. The madder your parent is, the more severe your punishment is likely to be. Never insult your parents.

Is it bad I don't like my family?

Yes,

it is completely okay to cut ties with your family

if they don't respect you and are causing you major distress in your life. Here are some instances where cutting your family out of your life is acceptable: Suppose your family tries to make you feel unhappy because they are unhappy (misery loves company).

How do you tell if your mom hates you?

  1. She never shows affection.
  2. She blames you for her unhappiness.
  3. She favors your siblings over you.
  4. She gaslights you and blames you for things you have no control over.
  5. She consistently undermines your achievements.
  6. She compares you to others to make you appear to be a failure.

How do I not hate my parents?

  1. Stay calm. When a horrid parent starts criticising you it can be frightening and infuriating. …
  2. Learn to accept your situation. …
  3. Don't retaliate. …
  4. Look to your future with hope. …
  5. Believe in yourself. …
  6. Talk to someone you trust. …
  7. Look after yourself.

How do I control my anger with my parents?

  1. Get lots of physical activity. Play outside. …
  2. Talk to your mom or dad. If you're having trouble with your temper, the time to talk about it is before you have another angry outburst. …
  3. Put feelings into words. Get in the habit of saying what you're feeling and why. …
  4. Take control.

How do you tell your mom you hate her?

Tell them how you feel.

Be very

honest

and open and get out all of your true feelings about them. Say “I have been thinking about this for a while. As parent and child, our relationship should not be this way. But because of things that have happened, and things that you have done specifically, I hate you.”

What are signs of a toxic mother?

  • She Overreacts to Differences of Opinion. …
  • She Makes Excessive Demands of You. …
  • She Uses Manipulation to Get What She Wants. …
  • She Fails to Respect Your Boundaries. …
  • She Puts Down Your Accomplishments. …
  • She Hurts You With Her Words or Actions. …
  • She Refuses to Apologize. …
  • She Tries to Control You.

Is it bad to cry in front of your child?


It's OK to be vulnerable in front of your child

, but be aware of the frequency and intensity of these moments and be sure to talk about it afterward. When parents feel upset or about to cry, they may be tempted to suppress these emotions or hide their tears from their children.

Is it OK to tell a child to shut up?

Telling your children to ‘shut up' may not only come off as rude – it is also

unhealthy

and to some extent, demeaning. You may want to say it as a quick way to enforce discipline, but it may scar your child forever.

What should you never say to a teenage girl?

  • “You're SO selfish!” All teens are self-absorbed. …
  • “Stop being so moody!” She can't! …
  • “Drugs and alcohol can kill you!” It's true that drugs and alcohol can kill, but making extreme dramatic statements undermines your credibility.

What are things toxic parents say?

A toxic parent's behavior is defined by

self-centered attitudes, controlling, physical and psychological abuse, manipulations, and complete disregard for personal boundaries

. Generally, try to control you by invoking a sense of intense guilt, obligation, or inadequacy.

Why are teenage daughters so mean to their mothers?

Teens want to feel that

they're more in control of their relationships and lives

. They're striving for an increased sense of independence. These feelings often translate to disrespectful, rebellious behavior. According to an article by Psychology Today, children can sense and will react negatively.

Is it good to be strict parents?

Research shows that most people think

strict parenting produces better-behaved kids

. However, research studies on discipline consistently show that strict, or authoritarian, child-raising actually produces kids with lower self esteem who behave worse than other kids — and therefore get punished more!

Can I run away from my parents?

A runaway is a minor (someone under the age of 18) who leaves home without a parent's or guardian's permission, and is gone from the home overnight. In most states, running away is not a crime; however, runaways and their parents or guardians can face

legal consequences

.

Why do I cry when my parents scold me?


Feeling that you disappointed a parent figure you want

respect from. You learned by crying it reduces the actual time of being scolded. It's a subconscious attempt to throw guilt on the the parent. It a way of showing submissiveness to authority.

Is it OK to run away from home?


Running away can be unsafe

, especially if you don't have somewhere safe to go. Travelling to a different town or somewhere you haven't been to before is a bad idea. But you could think about: going to a friend's home.

How long should you ground a 13 year old?

Grounding for a week,

or two or three weekends

is probably sufficient to get the message across without losing it over time. A month may be too long. As the parent of a teen, a shorter time gives you a lesser chance of caving in and reducing the grounding period later.

Is grounding your child illegal?

It is entirely lawful for parents to force their kids to go to school or to ground them. In fact, it is

the legal responsibility of parents to require their children to

attend school (or to home school them) in the US.

Why do I hate my sister?

Reasons Why You Might Hate Your Sister


Jealousy

: It is not unusual for siblings to be compared to each other, either by others or by themselves. … Abuse: If your sister has abused you or deeply hurt you in some way it may cause you to feel hatred toward her.

Why do teens hate their parents?

Part of being a teenager is

about separating and individuating

, and many teens feel like they need to reject their mom and dad in order to find their own identities. … Teenagers focus on their peers more than on their parents and siblings, which is normal too.

What should you never say to your parents?

  • Why words hurt. …
  • “So and so's mom is better than you” …
  • “I wish you weren't my dad” …
  • “You told me that already” …
  • “I wish you were dead” …
  • “You look ugly today” …
  • “I bet you can't wait to get back to work” …
  • “You love my brother/sister more than me”

Does grounding your child work?

But

long-term grounding is not effective in teaching your child

the lesson you want him to learn. … And ultimately, they're not going to learn the lesson you want them to learn. In contrast, short-term grounding is effective when it's used as a consequence given to the child after a problem-solving discussion.

Why do I hate my mum so much?

People usually harbor feelings of hatred towards their mothers when

they believe they've been mistreated, neglected

, or abused. Relationships with mothers are often complicated. Rarely are mothers ‘all-bad' figures, and therein lies the problem.

Why do moms get angry so easily?

What is this? One real reason moms get angry at our kids is

because we expect them to act grown up

. It's impossible to be a calm mom all the time. But if we stop and count how many times their “childishness” makes us angry, we may just become less angry.

Why does my teenage daughter make me so angry?

Other teens experience intense anger as a symptom of a mental health issue, traumatizing life experience, or simply from the stress and pressures of adolescence. Some of these common triggers of severe anger in teens include:

Low self-esteem

.

Victim of bullying or persistent & unhealthy peer pressure

.

How can I make my parents happy after bad grades?

Explain to your parents why you did poorly.

Show them the effort you put in

. Tell them that you understand where you made your mistakes and that you can fix them by making a few changes such as participating more in class or dedicating more time to homework.

How do I calm my mom down?

Taking a Mommy time out: Put up a

“do not disturb

” sign on your bedroom door. Listen to relaxing music or plant a picture in your mind of a soothing place. Take five minutes to decompress. Give permission to “take ten”: Let everyone in your family know it's OK to walk away until they can get back in control.

Is it normal for your parents to make you cry everyday?


It's not normal

. It's unhealthy for you to be crying everyday. You shouldn't be crying everyday, nobody should be crying everyday. If your mother is intentionally making you cry daily, my dear, that's emotional abuse and I beg you to sound the alarm.

Why does my mom get mad when I cry?

And of course, since parents are genetically programmed to become emotionally concerned when their offspring cries, and often get

an adrenaline surge automatically when they

do..and since adrenaline is like excess caffeine in the bloodstream, and tends to make a person irritable, parents can APPEAR to be angry at a …

Is my mum toxic?

Other signs of having a toxic relationship with your mother may include: Your toxic mother

is emotionally unavailable to you

. Your toxic mother may withhold love or affection from you while giving it to others, leaving you feeling unwanted or unloved. She is dismissive of your feelings.

What are daddy issues?

Daddy issues is an informal phrase for the

psychological challenges resulting from an absent or abnormal relationship with one's father

, often manifesting in a distrust of, or sexual desire for, men who act as father figures.

Did I grow up in a toxic family?

If you were raised in a toxic family, you may have been asked to: parent or discipline younger siblings or provide most of their care. take on responsibilities like cooking meals or doing certain heavy chores before you could safely or capably do so.

provide emotional support

as if you were a partner or other adult.

How do I know if my family hates me?

If someone is constantly putting you down or boldly saying they hate you, that's evidence enough. If you discover it's more your own feeling than the way others actually treat or speak to you, consider talking with

a trained counselor

who can help you understand why.

Maria LaPaige
Author
Maria LaPaige
Maria is a parenting expert and mother of three. She has written several books on parenting and child development, and has been featured in various parenting magazines. Maria's practical approach to family life has helped many parents navigate the ups and downs of raising children.